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Monday, February 19, 2007

PTSD and The Returning Soldier

I want to write here about something I know a little something about, PTSD, otherwise known as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. This is not psychobabble, it is a very real condition that affects 5.2 million Americans! What is it?: Here is some information by the American Medical Association.

What is Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)?
PTSD is a real illness. People may get PTSD after living through a disturbing or frightening experience. It can be treated with medicine and therapy.You can get PTSD after you have been:
Raped or sexually abused
Hit or harmed by someone in your family
A victim of a violent crime
In an airplane or car crash
In a hurricane, tornado, or fire
In a war,
In an event where you thought you might be killed, or
After you have seen any of these events.

If you have PTSD, you often have nightmares or scary thoughts about the experience you went through. You try to stay away from anything that reminds you of your experience.
You may feel angry and unable to trust or care about other people. You may always be on the lookout for danger. You can feel very upset when something happens suddenly or without warning.

This Disorder will affect almost every American soldier, your son, your daughter on return from Iraq. Regardless, of what you believe or think about this war, it doesn't matter, but it does matter to your children. I know, I suffer from PTSD. Mine is very complicated, it is the result of years as a Firefighter and a Medic and then the horrible car crash I was in.and other incidents in my life. The most important one to trigger it was a car crash where I was driving, that ended with the death of my dear wife of 27 years.

The truth is, God is always right, especially when it comes to war. Jesus, taught us to love our enemies. Whenever a soldier man or woman kills or maims or injures another human being, regardless of what he is taught in the military, regardless of what he believes his justification is, deeper in his psyche, something will happen. This shock to the human mind will be there as an enduring memory. A very bad memory.
These are just a few of the symptoms you can expect your loved one to have when they do return from Iraq.
This is a small list compiled of the symptoms and treatments for Veterans. I drew this from the web site Viet Nam Vets against the War in Iraq. These are men who returned to find their lives in shambles and many ended up on the streets of America, homeless and messed up, drug users and alcoholics and wondering with no direction to go, until they found help.

And the good soldier John or the good troop Jane, who under fire never once thought of your civil rights, your silly flag, your doofus politics. Good Johnny or Jane, I say, feel and act a tad differently when the locked down feelings, bottled up memories, instinctive behaviors of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder fervently, unexpectedly kick in.
The symptoms of PTSD, in plain bloody English, are as follows:

• Flashbacks: seeing and feeling a combat event as if it were happening right now.
• Hyper Vigilance: being always on guard, always looking for where the next shot, next grenade, next rocket, ambush or IED will come next.
• Survivor Guilt: feeling bad, feeling real bad for having survived, where others in the platoon or squad didn't.
• Moral Guilt: wrestling with actions one did or did not take on.
• Startle Reflex: dropping, flinching, turning fast at a sudden noise or unexpected touch.
• Suicidal Ideation: thinking of killing oneself.
• Homicidal ideation: thinking of killing people. Friends or complete strangers.
• Homicidal Rage: anger way out of proportion to an everyday event. It comes quick, down and dirty.
• Sadness, depression, anxiety, crying spells: Staring into space, saying nothing.
• Nightmares: violent dreams related to combat. Sometimes it's the same dream. Some vets make strange noises. Thrash in bed. Wake up scared, or sweaty.
• Ritual Behavior: at night checking the lights, locking the doors, maybe keeping a weapon at hand.
• Alienation: a vet feels as if no one understands him, doesn't fit in, feels as if he or she should have never returned
• Panic Attack: for a short time the combat vet becomes suddenly and intensely afraid. He or she sweats, breathes hard. has a pounding heart, might get dizzy, choke
• Social isolation: staying alone for long periods of time. Or in public saying very little. To the point of being noticeably very quiet
• Drug and alcohol abuse: whatever works to dull the pain glowing inside one's head
•Fear of emotional intimacy: combats often won't let anyone get close to them. If someone gets too close. the vet backs off or pushes them away
• Employment: a lot of vets can't keep a job. Every couple of months quit or get fired
• Psychic Numbing: not have the ability to feel emotions. Vets talk about feeling hollow, blank, empty.
• Denial: Problems'! What problem? I don't have a problem.
•High Risk Behavior: doing daredevil stuff to re-live the rush of combat.

These symptoms are normal responses to extraordinary events outside the range of normal human experience. Most civilians are clueless about combat and its aftermath.

Some types of treatment:

• The talking Cure: a vet talks to a therapist who is skilled in treating war stress and is not a paid bullshitter.
• Group therapy: seven to ten vets meet once a week for an hour or two. A good group leader is essential. That person knows when to talk, when to listen, how to keep the vets focused. Otherwise, group therapy can get lame fast
EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing): a form of hypnosis in which the vet is fully awake.
• Exercise. Meditation. Meds. A friend who will just listen. An artistic endeavor.
and
*Faith in God.

One other thing. This is real important: a lot of Vets fear talking about war. They fear losing control. Breaking down. Crying. My advice to those who have seen combat; face yourself. Chances are good you will learn to live less in the past, more in the present, but you will never be the same. WW II. Korea, Panama. Vietnam, Iraq, Afghanistan, Central America, wherever you were. Whatever you did in war will always be with you. Always.

PTSD will not only affect your son or daughter, husband or wife but it will at times devastate them. You must be prepared to handle this, you need to research it now, so you can help them through.

I have been on medication for almost 5 years now that has helped some, I sleep better, I eat better and the flashbacks to the things that have affected me aren't as bad, but at anytime, something can trigger it. PTSD, has cost me jobs, difficulties in my marriage and in my family life, it has affected my behavior. My PTSD came as a result of seeing too much death, injury and stupidity of humans, murder, fights, and more. Much of this came in the late 80's and early 90's due to my 3.5 years of being a FireFighter/Medic and in my 20 years as a Private Investigator, I saw it all.
I have seen people, opened up like animals while doing part of my duty as a Medic in assisting the Pathologist with autopsies at the local hospital. This was part of our duties, when we weren't on a call. I have seen bodies, fried by fire, maimed and killed by others, children dead and more. The thing that topped it all off was the attempted rescue of my wife's own life while she lay in my arms beside me in our car and I gave her mouth to mouth, praying and hoping for her to live. She didn't. The memory of that incident has never faded. The whole accident often will attack my dreams and my daytime thoughts. The memory of others who have suffered similar losses in car accidents, mountain climbing and flying and more will always be there. Death, is something we must all live with, as someday we will die as well.
The hardest part for your returning Vets, will be that they were often responsible directly for the death of another human being. This is reality.
I wasn't responsible for the incidents I was involved in, but all the same, there is something in the human soul that loves life and clings to life and doesn't want to take life. That I believe is the creation we were made to be. We were made in the likeness of our Creator who called each of us to not kill others. Jesus clairifed this. It isn't left to argument. Love thine enemy, take no vengeance. These words are hard for Americans. They for too long have had war glorified in television and movies. They have not lived it.
Regardless of the Religionist and the Old Testament incidents. One, must realize, that in the end, death will be swallowed up and it will never exist again. This is God's purpose- life.
The thought of those dying around you, by you or near you, is not an experience every American has experienced. Thank God, this is so. September 9, 2001 was really the first experience for American "civilians"to have dealing with senseless violence and death. This is commonplace stuff in war torn countries, they live it out, they live through 911's everyday.
We can't even imagine what it is like, Iraqi's do, Palestianians do, Israeli's do and many other people in this world torn by war and greed. They watch their family members die in their arms.
Women, children and men. It doesn't matter, until you have been there and experienced the reality which goes far beyond the edited media you get on television news in America or in the war movies you watch.
It is as the voice of Marlon Brando in his part in as the renegade General in the movie "Apocalypse" said over and over at the end of the scene, "the horror of it all, the horror, the horror. "
You can't even begin to know what really goes on in the mind of a returning veteran who has actually been engaged in war, killing and seeing the death of fellow soldiers. He will pretend, often using profanity, as if it was no big deal. It's all a lie, he or she is afraid to cry. Let them cry, let them spill out their guts. This can be the beginning of healing.

God, deliver us from any more foolish wars for the sake of men's greed and need to influence power over others.
God keep you safe from ever having to experience what millions of police officers, firefighters, medics, soldiers and other health workers across the world deal with everyday in their duties. Find someone to talk to.
I can tell you, there is One who not only forgives, but comforts and that is your heavenly Father. He can teach you how to start letting go.
My PTSD grows less and less, but all the same, I still need medication to help me. Don't fear admitting, it hurts, it is terrible or whatever it takes to begin the healing process.
I'm still healing and probably will for a very long, long time. The good thing, is I know that my future is held by my Father in heaven and there is coming a day, when death will be swallowed up in victory. The fear is subsiding, the hope is returning.
I only can hope and pray for those that chose to put themselves in such a position as our soldiers to do the bidding of politicians, who will return with PTSD. God help them and their familes to understand. If you haven't lived it, you can't imagine, "the horror."

Dr. J.

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